Giveaway gift for the wonderful @funkyfluffyman.bsky.social!
“Let’s see!” the sex store employee chirps, walking past a row of pup hoods and 14 inch double-ended dildos like it’s nothing. She leads Exzy to the back of the store to the personal pleasure devices, just as many Fleshlights and masturbators and prostate massagers as the eye can take in. “It definitely depends on your budget and your experience! But we can definitely find the right one for you.”
Normally, Exzy would be thrilled about this. Taking a couple of hours to pursue the toy store, really sifting through all of the options and finding the one he can spend all night with. With the 50 dollars burning a hole in his pocket, he could go for anything on the cheaper end. Then, since his partners are unavailable, there’d be nothing else to do but go home, enjoy his toy, and just chiiiiiiiiiiiill out. Nothing better to do then get some grub and just go at it for a couple of hours.
But this hog has been frustrated. He’s already spent all day aroused, thinking about getting home and getting off. After a long day of, well, unemployment, he doesn’t want to stand here listening to the employee rattle off sales statistics and customer testimonials, he wants to GET OFF. He’ll take just about anything he can stick his dick into.
But she just keeps talking, and the hog can’t take it anymore.
He cuts her off mid-sentence. “Just give me whatever you have that’s the cheapest.”
“... Oh,” she says. “Okay.” She squats and pulls something off the bottom shelf. “Do you have a color preference?” she asks sheepishly.
“The green one?” he responds, embarrassed at his curtness but thankful to finally be getting out of here.
As she places it in his hoof, he can feel himself leak a little into his boxer briefs. That’s when he knows it’s time to get out. He pays as quickly as he can and leaves the store with his new toy in his bag, ready to get home and get to it.
After a frustrating walk home, he finally bursts through his door. Exzy kicks his shoes off, flicks his sweatpants down and waddles to his bed with them around his ankles. He throws himself on his bed which creaks with his weight. The fabric of his underwear is already stained dark with precum, and as he pulls them down and his cock flies back, a little pool of precum forms on his tummy. He puts his hoof on his tip and a nice string forms as he pulls it away.
He can’t help but start to jerk himself off. The feeling is pleasant but not satisfying. He’s been waiting the whole day to FUCK SOMETHING, not just play around with his hoof, for fuck’s sake. It’s at least enough to tide himself over as he lays back and fumbles to open the packaging with one hoof.
Exzy has to drop his dick and really rip the toy out of it’s packaging. A little bottle of lube and the instructions fall out of the package with it, but the hog doesn’t need any help doing what his body wants to do so naturally. He has his own lube on the bedside table. He lumbers over, precum coating his thighs and his shirt as he folds over to grab the lube. He probably doesn’t need any more lubricant with what he’s got going down there. He lubes himself and the toy up, then wipes his sweaty, lube-covered hoof on the bedsheets and gets himself right into position.
“Easy…” he whispers to himself, pressing the tip of his cock right into the soft insert. “Eaaaasy there…”
And he presses himself right in.
And the feeling is underwhelming.
He lets out a grunt, not from pleasure but of complete confusion, like being at the top of a staircase and expecting to find another step but finding air instead. It felt better just to use his hoof. He presses himself all the way in with both hooves, pulls out with that classic squishing sound, and then presses himself back in. Yeah. Not exactly what he was looking for.
The hog furrows his brow. He’s been so sexually frustrated today this toy being unsatisfying only makes him more desperate. He bucks his hips forward with his back on the bed and his feet on the ground, then begins to slide himself in and out of it. The sensation feels more like fucking, but with the sweat literally dripping down his back, Exzy wants something more than just something that feels “like fucking.” He wants to fuck. Hard. Now.
This is what he gets asking the employee for the cheapest toy so he could get out of there, he thinks, but there was no way he could spend a single second longer in there before he was going to go crazy with arousal. Exzy is going to make this work. He needs to.
Bringing his knees up onto the bed and finally letting his sweatpants drop to the floor, he grips the toy with both hooves tight. Way tighter than he knows he should be treating this plastic, but he could not care less about that anymore.
Finally, finally, it feels like he’s getting somewhere. He grips it so tight his hooves could explode and goes at it, thrusting over and over, deep inside of his toy. He grunts and whines. The movement is so slick, so easy, that all of the tension of holding the toy tight and of the day’s woes just slip away. There is nothing but the hog and his toy.
“God…” he whimpers to himself. “Fuuuuuuuck.”
He’s so close. He’s so so so fucking close. Just a few more pumps and the boar is going to be letting out his load. Exzy closes his eyes, he grits his teeth, he grips the toy tighter, tighter, tighter…
And then the thing cracks into two pieces right in his hooves. Right as he’s letting out his load.
It’s miniscule. It’s nothing. He’s cumming, the tip of the plastic sleeve is filling with his semen, but it feels just about as good as riding the bus. He’s so surprised when the green plastic falls down to the bed that he can do nothing but watch his cock throb inside of the sleeve in shock. He pulls out of the sleeve, a pool of cum dripping down onto his bedsheets, and drops the insert to the bed.
That’s 50 dollars down the drain. That’s, in fact, a whole day of build up gone, none of his frustration relieved in the slightest. He wants to hit the bed he’s so frustrated.
But his cock is still hard. Usually after a nut like that, he’d already be fast asleep, but he’s still at attention. He sneaks his hoof down to his cock, expecting the sensation to be too sensitive for him to get anywhere. It’s a little sensitive, but it actually feels really good. The hog can probably go for another round. The relief in that, that he might still get to have the orgasm he’s been looking for all day, is endless.
“Okay…” Exzy whispers to himself, gripping his cock with his hoof. It’s not going to feel like fucking something, but if he can just get himself back to normal, he can look at this more logically. Still kneeling on the bed, he strokes himself a few times.
But all of the lube is making his cock so slippery and the sensation is nothing compared to how good gripping the toy felt. He grabs the broken plastic and just holds it in his hands, a sharp, sad whine coming out of his mouth.
He flops to the bed, frustrated and horny and sad and embarrassed, and resolves to just lie there and do nothing.
But there’s still the silicon insert.
It’s too slimy with lube and with his own cum for him to really hold it, but if he presses it between his belly and his bed, that’ll hold it just fine. If anything, it’ll feel more like fucking way more than what he was doing before.
But, of course, the sensation of his cock pressed into the insert feels pretty good.
So Exzy starts humping the silicon insert.
It’s a mess of sweat and lube and precum but he doesn’t care. He grips the bedsheets and humps like his life depends on it. The thick hog swaying forward and back makes the bed shake a little with his impact.
“Fuuuuuuuck,” he whimpers, his head pressed into his pillow. “Mmmmmmmppppphhh…”
It’s going to happen. It’s going to happen. It’s going to happen fucking the insert next to a pile of broken plastic, but it’s going to happen. He grips the bed as tight as he can and gives a few more thrusts before the sensation is just too much.
It washes over him like a wave. His thighs ache as he pumps rope after rope of cum into the already cum-drenched insert. He cums a lot, so he just has to sit there and wait as he empties himself out. The relief, finally, feels so good.
After what was basically a full-body workout, he can’t help but pant. The hog flips over, his shirt and crotch just a whole mess of cum. He lies back, unsticks his hair from his face, and chuckles. The insert sliiiides right off of his cock and drops to the floor with a wet thwap.
Exzy closes his eyes and lets out a satisfied sigh.