Hi puppy!
I’m outta the shower
HI HI HI
hi i missed uuuuu
i missed u all day hehe
I missed you too puppy
What are you up to right now
Do you wanna vc?
i cant rn
im in the living room
its family movie night
we had carbonara for dinner
and now we’re watching a movie
we’re the perfect family
What movie are you watching
mamma mia
with meryl streep!
she’s great omg
What
But we always vc
We can’t vc?
sorry </3
We have to text each other
Like in the olden days
Your parents have no problem with you being on the phone?
they’re on the phone too
gracie is texting her online boyfriend why cant i
Your sister is always texting her online boyfriend
Wait
Am I your online boyfriend now
you are heheheheh
No
I am your in real life boyfriend
We hang out with each other after school
And you watch my hockey games and we cuddle in the park
I am not your virtual boyfriend
sorry baby u r relegated to my screen right now
Get me out!!!!
I’m scratching at the screen
dont scratch my phone screen
Puppy get me out
jk it’s cool
You’re having family phone time
idk this is how im used to texting my friends
ur the only person i video chat with
and my therapist
Yeah because you’re a discord puppy
You use discord to chat with your minecraft friends
ur not just my virtual boyfriend…
ur my DISCORD BOYFRIEND
Arghghghhhhhhghhh
*explodes*
noooooooooo
r ur fingers atrophying yet
do u remember how to type
Where are you
Why can I see the words you’re texting but not you
hehehehehehe
how was hockey practice
It was so good
I was totally thinking about you the whole time which only made me stronger
like whacking me with the hockey stick?
Or maybe cuddling with you
Kissing you
reaaaaallly?
Yes silly puppy
hehehehehe
what did u get up to afterwards
More college stuff and the chem homework
nooooo not the problem set
the problem set sucks butt
I can send my answers to you if you want
no dont worry i got it done before family movie night
so i could focus on the movie
i mean all of the answers are wrong but
Maybe some of them are right
u r so right
And then I was helping my dad prepare a bunch of fish he caught
Which is why I took another shower
wait r u fishy
Cause I’m all fishy
OMG BABY
you know i love it when ur fishy
I’m so fishy puppy
It’s not even funny
wowwww
u had a busy day
have u had dinner yet?
My dad’s cooking up some fish right now
So that’ll be dinner
yummmmm
i love fish
I miss you puppy
This isn’t fair
I was thinking about you all day and know I can’t even see you
im sorry!!!!
i dont think i can worm out of this but i can see if i can come over afterwards
hold on let me ask
gracie is taking the car after
What
Is she driving to see her online boyfriend
Not funny
You have a real online boyfriend to see
Tell your Dad that Tadeo’s having a hockey emergency
It’s not like we’re going to do anything crazy
ill see you tomorrow at school i mean…
and we can text for as long as u want
Boo
I miss my boyfriend
I wanna kiss you on the forehead
i want u to kiss me on the forehead hehehe
I wanna hold you and cuddle you
me tooooooo
Wait what are you wearing
I don’t even know what you’re wearing
im wearing ur hockey jersey actually
the maple leaves one
I was wondering where that was!
I left it at your place?
Aw that’s so cute
it smells like u
Like sweat?
nicer than that
like a sweet candle
a little bit of sweat maybe but in a good way
its super big on me its like im wearing a tent
I bet you look so cute
I bet you look freaking adorable
Plus we’re kinda the same height
yeah so its okay lengthwise but its super huge the other way
its like a wedding gown
You’re thin!
That’s okay
Wait are you wearing it right now
i am…
During family movie night!?!!?!
hehehehe yeah
my dad asked about it and i said it was yours
What did he say
he was like yeah duh
ur not watching hockey by urself
I bet you look so freaking cute right now
hehehehe im blushing
dont make me blush
Meryl Streep is just so good, Dad!
what r u wearing
Nothing
what……..
I just got out of the shower remember
ohhh so not nothing
like a towel
Yeah silly puppy
I’m lying on my bed right now in a towel
ok i thought u meant like nothing nothing
I mean it can be nothing nothing
There
Took the towel off
omg……………….
omg omg tadeo im with my parents!!!!!!!!!!
They can’t see anything!
You can’t see anything either
It’s all in your head
ahhhhh my dad is right there omg
Towel is back on
We are safe
holy crap
I’m sorry is this making you uncomfortable puppy
We can move on
no no no ummmmm
no i like it
Okay
Tell me if you wanna talk about something else ever
r u really just in ur towel
You don’t believe me
no no i do i just
ahhhh idk
Well I’m not in a towel anymore so you’re right
I threw it across the room
hehehehe yeah?
Yeah puppy dog
Now I’m doing a little dance
Naked!
whaaat
what would u do
if i could get the car
Puppy!
just like magical fantasy land bc i know gracie isnt giving it up
I see
And my dad isn’t home in this scenario?
he’s asleep
or fishing
night fishing
Well
Well I suppose you would drive over, huh?
And I’d get dressed super quickly
Just a pair of shorts and my tank top
Maybe I wouldn’t even have time to put something on and I’d have to answer the door in my towel
yeah?
Yeah
And then you’d be standing at the door in my jersey
And I’d give you a big big hug
And I’d give you a bunch of compliments like you’re so cute and you look so good
Which you are and you do
hehehehehe yeah?
And we’d go back to my room
And I’d go put something on so I wasn’t just in my towel
wellll u wouldn’t have to
Yes you’re right
I’d sit down in my towel and you’d sit down next to me
I would give you a kiss on the forehead
Big big kiss
And then I’d kiss your muzzle
and we start making out?
Yeah yeah and then we make out
and im totally sweating bc ur only in a towel and u look super hot
and ur abs r hard and ur pecs are big
And we’d kiss for a super long time
Because there’s no one to interrupt us and nothing to do but kiss
yeah?
And maybe my paw would reach up your shirt
And I’d touch your chest
id touch ur chest too
id touch ur abs
I would flex them for you
And you’d be very impressed
i would be
And I’d touch your soft tummy
And put my hands on your thighs
yeah baby?
Yeah puppy
And your tail would be thumping on the bed when I did that
And maybe my paws would reach up a little more
And I’d touch your inner thigh through your shorts
omg
Yeah
And then
and then…
Wait hold on
AND THEN!!?!?!??!
Sorry sorry puppy
Sorry my dad was knocking at the door
but ur naked!
I threw the towel on
I bet he thought I was doing something else lol
what did he want
He was calling me to dinner
I told him to give me ten minutes
omg omg
wait so whaaaaat
would you do next
Well
In the spirit of our texts
I think I’ll leave a little to the imagination
I bet you can imagine what we’d do next
holy crap
holy craaaaaap
oh my god this is crazy
omg my parents r right freaking there
Did you like what I wrote?
omggggg
im a little…
im a little aroused right now
Aw puppy
Me too
im a little hard right now…
is that ok to say…
I mean I am too
I’m not even weaning anything
You have the jersey to cover up
omg
Are you comfortable talking about this?
I know we haven’t really done anything in person
Which is totally okay
But I know this kind of talk has made you uncomfortable before
i mean i think
just to be honest
it might be easier because we’re texting
Yeah?
idk it’s just kind of scary in person or on a video call
because you’re right there!
this is how i’m used to talking u know
Yeah I know puppy
Discord boyfriend
i like this hehe
I like this too
I bet you look so damn cute right now
In my jersey
welllll maybe i can take a photo?
I would like that very much
How are you gonna get out of family movie night?
im gonna say i need to use the bathroom
ok ill text u in a second
I am waiting eagerly
ok ok im in my bedroom
can i send a pic
Yes please
is it ok if its a little
like
dirty
Yes yes yes please
Don’t worry I’m alone
I would love to see it
Don’t feel pressured but yes I would love to see it
ok ok
ok one second
Of course puppy
Take your time
Holy shit
…
do u like it
Yes sorry
I am in awe
I am in slack-jawed awe
Hold on
hehehe sorry
Holy crap
Is that my boyfriend?
That’s my hockey jersey
That’s my boyfriend’s room
There’s his gamer chair
And his string lights
And his fish posters
But is that dog…
The cutest sweetest silliest sexiest little puppy in the world…
Is that my boyfriend?
it is hehe
IT IS!?
I AM THE LUCKIEST MAN IN THE WORLD!
I AM THE LUCKIEST MAN ALIVE!
LOOK AT YOU!
YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL!
YOU ARE SO GORGEOUS!
hehehehehehe omg
Thank you so much Kip
Thank you for trusting me with this
I really am so lucky to be dating you
omg
im sorry im like almost crying right now
That’s okay puppy
How are you feeling?
im hard but im crying
Cutie puppy
I wanna hug you right now
Give you a big big hug
ughhhh i gotta get back soon
they’re gonna think something’s up
I gotta get to dinner too
i can’t talk about this anymore omg
not in front of my family
can we hang out after hockey practice tomorrow?
Yes please
And we can text each other after dinner
About less salacious things
okay okay cool
i’ll talk to you later baby <3
Bye puppy!
bye!!!!